Friday, January 10, 2014

Mind The Gap



Dear,

This night I gaze above, I try to connect the dots that stretch through the darkness of the sky, closing a light year gap between you and me. I have tried to retrace them in the light of the dawn, I see the bird-path, and I think of you. I see the sign, the time is near for me to go back.


I think often writing you a letter, but then I open up the drawer at my desk and look at those numerous notes- once had I written but couldn't pass them to you. I look back at the door I have closed behind. Many bridges we both had burned and in the afterglow we parted. And now, when I think I might go back, I do not know if you will be there waiting for me at the other end. I do not know if I can ever find my way back. 

This world will always be full of letters, and some of those letters will be mine, unwritten, drawn through lines of crease that close them to fold at the day's end.

For you, I wait for the day-break. For you, I write poems of our passing time, running through the shadows of sadness and laughter.

Me...

Friday, July 29, 2011

ending a friendship


there's more to it.... coming soooooooooooooooooooooner !

Sunday, July 24, 2011

in-flight entertainment

This is what I look mostly like when I'm up in the air... drowsy! :-/
Frankly, I don't have much higher opinion about the in-flight entertainment offered by our domestic airlines. A year back, I flew with Kingfisher airlines and through out the journey I tried, literally, to watch Amitabh Bachhan's "Paa" - it was a pathetic experience, not the film but the console system of the airline. It was measly if quality counts. But...hey! so that goes for the airline foods! :D  Mostly after that I have traveled by far on IndiGo, and here they don't offer any such things but every time the flight goes up and starts to glide no matter how chaffed I was about a few hours ago during check in, my belly starts to growl. Inevitably I feel hungry up there. And all the time I end up buying a chicken-sandwich for myself. Which is quite good in IndiGo but nothing like good o'l days of  IA and when Jet was the only private airline [ along with Sahara] and all of them used to give 'food' free, no matter how bad they can be [ IA once served samosa and pantua on board !! thankfully that was my last flight on IA and I was a class 12 kid on my way back home, all alone, during my school's summer recess.]  

Once during pujo , some flood happened and all railroads were blocked connecting north and south of Bengal and we have to go back home by air, and it was the only time I had my share of experience in travelling by business class [ you are right, that doesn't happen all the time and for me never happened thereafter.] It was Jet Premier... man! oh! man! for a kid , it was the best thing could ever come true during pujo. Of course! I was "hayngla" and still shamelessly very much I am. Right from having the privileges of lounging with the air hostesses in the special lounge area after check-in to having the tryst with the first bite into the thin-crusty-club-sandwich... total upper crust! [ yes, I have been to Flury's only for a couple of times and so anything culinary and gourmet is always alien to me and mind it, 'am very much "hayngla" ! :) ]. And to top that, getting a pair of cold and hot hand-towels while on board and once again being served gourmet food with chocolate pudding as a dessert. For a flight of one hour, I actually kept hanging in trance! Alas! gone are those days....then Deccan came and changed everything :( . Now they don't even give free candies on board in budget airlines and economy classes [providing the scientific facts that they come much handy while taking off and touching down to clear the blocked ears]. Nobody gives a damn!


Today while returning from Varanasi after visiting Sarnath, I watched a documentary [ BBC's Human Planet ] . Watching documentary is actually quite a good thing to do on board. I don't have to resort to a headphone, without sound, just following the flow of the story is fine for me, it's impaired but works just fine. It kept my mind engaged, as I tend to get freaked out while the plane takes off. I just start to feel a giga gravitational under-belly pull during the take off and always it scares the shit out me. I know, it sounds ridiculous but I can't help it. On the contrary I don't feel any fear while the craft lands, funny eh!! This time, it was my return flight. While going there, three days ago from Kolkata, there was heavy rain all day long. Even while boarding the whole runway at Kolkata airport was fogged by heavy rain. The visibility was abysmally reduced. While we were waiting for our delayed flight, just before boarding Jet kept us waiting at the ground for about 20 minutes. All of those passengers were waiting in a queue and heavy rain was pouring in, needlessly to say I already started to feel sick and for the rest of the journey I felt groggy, sick and tired. But this time I was fine. Of course I silently freaked out during take off! :D



This is a part of the documentary I saw during my - up in the air! It's nice. 

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

presque vu

is there any novel or story line ever written on a dystopian concept of keeping the prisoners captive inside their minds in sort of binding their thoughts, senses, cognizance instead of holding them behind the bars ? or is that me imagining the whole out of my overdoses of kafka, Murakami and Science Fiction Films... ??

Monday, June 13, 2011

an unfailing art

I once read this in Chuck Palahniuk's ''The Cult'' -

Another Christmas window story. Almost every morning, I eat breakfast in the same diner, and this morning a man was painting the windows with Christmas designs. Snowmen. Snowflakes. Bells. Santa Claus. He stood outside on the sidewalk, painting in the freezing cold, his breath steaming, alternating brushes and rollers with different colors of paint. Inside the diner, the customers and servers watched as he layered red and white and blue paint on the outside of the big windows. Behind him the rain changed to snow, falling sideways in the wind. The painter's hair was all different colors of gray, and his face was slack and wrinkled as the empty ass of his jeans. Between colors, he'd stop to drink something out of a paper cup. Watching him from inside, eating eggs and toast, somebody said it was sad. This customer said the man was probably a failed artist. It was probably whiskey in the cup. He probably had a studio full of failed paintings and now made his living decorating cheesy restaurant and grocery store windows. Just sad, sad, sad. This painter guy kept putting up the colors. All the white "snow," first. Then some fields of red and green. Then some black outlines that made the color shapes into Xmas stockings and trees. A server walked around, pouring coffee for people, and said, "That's so neat. I wish I could do that…" And whether we envied or pitied this guy in the cold, he kept painting. Adding details and layers of color. And I'm not sure when it happened, but at some moment he wasn't there. The pictures themselves were so rich, they filled the windows so well, the colors so bright, that the painter had left. Whether he was a failure or a hero. He'd disappeared, gone off to wherever, and all we were seeing was his work.


The last Durga Puja when I was entering at the mall nearby , I saw this man drawing at the glass walls of some big store. He was drawing Dhak drum , Kaash flower and all those illustrations and images we see being drawn everywhere during the festival. The details of his hand drawing at a glance reminded me of the above passage by Palahniuk's write up.

No, the images he had drawn, were cleaned up a long time ago, after Pujo came Xmas and then a few months ago Poila Boishakh happened and each of these time a new piece of image adorned the very wall, but may be they were by different people.

Friday, June 10, 2011

প্রশ্ন / রবীন্দ্রনাথ ঠাকুর






মা গো, আমায় ছুটি দিতে বল্‌,
সকাল থেকে পড়েছি যে মেলা।
এখন আমি তোমার ঘরে ব'সে
করব শুধু পড়া-পড়া খেলা।
তুমি বলছ দুপুর এখন সবে,
নাহয় যেন সত্যি হল তাই,
একদিনও কি দুপুরবেলা হলে
বিকেল হল মনে করতে নাই?
আমি তো বেশ ভাবতে পারি মনে
সুয্যি ডুবে গেছে মাঠের শেষে,
বাগ্‌দি-বুড়ি চুবড়ি ভরে নিয়ে
শাক তুলেছে পুকুর-ধারে এসে।
আঁধার হল মাদার-গাছের তলা, কালি হয়ে এল দিঘির জল,
হাটের থেকে সবাই এল ফিরে, মাঠের থেকে এল চাষির দল।
মনে কর্‌-না উঠল সাঁঝের তারা, মনে কর্‌-না সন্ধে হল যেন।
রাতের বেলা দুপুর যদি হয়
দুপুর বেলা রাত হবে না কেন।

















Wednesday, May 25, 2011

I Just Saw a Fish Crying !!


I know a fish,  - like a gold fish. But is she a Gold-fish? That, I'm not certain. Things can be little hazy while seeing from the above, everything down below in the water seems from a different world, different time and space.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Tycho Brahe [sic] and Rupture [not sic]

Have posted on my wall today, actually a few hours ago - 
''I don't , really really I don't .... I don't want to be like Tycho Brahe ...< SIGH > '' [sic]

A friend asked - '' how come suddenly him? '' [sic]
 
I blurted - '' Brahe... for too many reasons.... too many!!! I don't want to die like him, I mean - the way he did. I don't want another Copernicus to usurp my under appreciated work, if there any , after I die... see it's all too bleak, not even half the fun like a kid screaming - die die die!!! while playing video games. And above all I don't wanna do away with any nose job , simply I prefer to flee than going for a duel, I guess... now do respond back to this or people will start to think I am talking to myself :D '' [sic]

My friend flustered, and retorted back - and how he died? I don't remember exactly... [not sic]

And me - ummm....you see, he had to hold his pee for too many long hours in order to not to offend the King's banquet he was attending and died tragically with the Ruptured bladder about five days later.... see, not a good way to die! Even if our so called the prophetic Rupture of 21st May happen or not... 

[ not sic again, cause he is yet to ask me that and I am yet to deliver this speech farther ] :D

So go to sleep in broken hearts people, Rupture ain't happening today!

Only some another friend said - "finally... I am out of the woods, and out of the "boulevard of broken dreams"!!"  [sic]

I told her, - "That's good, seems I am lost into the labyrinth of mine, only each and every time I feel I have seen a light at the end of the tunnel... some harp tune takes me back to the square one.... as if I am defaulted to the recycle mode."  [sic sic sic... pretty sick!]

She - "hmm., but this sounds like "we shall overcome"!!!!!!! LOL!! :D" [sic]

I, out of my perpetual awesomeness - "aha! favourite caller tune of life!" [sic]

And they postponed the Rupture, again!






Monday, May 16, 2011

West Of The Sun

There is a syndrome among the Inuits, called as - Piblokto, Pibloktoq or Arctic hysteria or Hysteria Siberiana. It is described as a condition exclusively appearing in Eskimo societies living within the Arctic Circle. Appearing most prevalently in winter, it is considered to be a form of a culture-bound syndrome.

Dietary science says - This culture-bound syndrome is possibly linked to vitamin A toxicity. The native Eskimo diet provides rich sources of vitamin A and is possibly the cause or a causative factor. The ingestion of organ meats, liver of arctic fish, mammals, where the vitamin is stored in toxic quantities can be fatal.

As if, 
"Imagine this. You're a farmer, living all alone on the Siberian tundra. Day after day you plow your fields. As far as the eye can see, nothing. To the north, the horizon, to the east, the horizon, to the south, to the west, more of the same. Every morning, when the sun rises in the east, you go out to work in your fields. When it's directly overhead, you take a break for lunch. When it sinks in the west, you go home to sleep. 

And then one day, something inside you dies. Day after day you watch the sun rise in the east, pass across the sky, then sink in the west, and something breaks inside you and dies. You toss your plow aside and, your head completely empty of thought, begin walking toward the west. Heading toward a land that lies west of the sun. Like someone, possessed, you walk on, day after day, not eating or drinking, until you collapse on the ground and die. That's hysteria siberiana." - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - South of the Border, West of the Sun / Murakami
When something inside dies, the shell that is all left behind shrivels. Looking up, the same sun rise and set everyday, and nothing really stirs the heart. On the wake what lay in front of the eyes are the roads to infinity. Imagine that lighthouse you have thought will glow for you to the eternity. But when even that gleam of light extinguishes, you still continue to walk. 
For, it's always what lay beyond will remain elusive.

Lampo

I was yet to attend the high school, around that time my first cousin who's many years older than me [about 15 years] gave me a book. He got that as a merit prize when he was in school, it was by Naryan Sanyal - Na-Manusher Kahini [ The stories about non-human ] , now by non-human he meant about the stories of animals. The book was consisted of several stories like that and most of them were based on true incidents. There I came across the story of 'Lampo', the travelling dog. It was the first story of the book and the last story on that book I remember was about a Amazonian Frog whose Frog-y fairy tale went horribly wrong! Now, Lampo was definitely a real thing. He existed in the south of Italy and the author found his story being reported on Reader's Digest. Later, much later I came across of the actual book based on Lampo in Amazon, sadly the book is obsolete and chances are it will never make it again to the shelves of new book houses, unless one has a chance to find it on a second hand book store. I wish i could be that fortunate one. But at least I still have the Bengali translated book with myself. I found an excerpt to the story -

Lampo, the traveling dog

One day an ordinary dog appeared in the ticket office at Campiglia, a busy railroad station on Italy's main line. A ticket agent named Elvio greeted the strange dog in a friendly way, so the dog decided to stay. From that day on, the dog became Elvio's shadow and was named Lampo.

Lampo kept Elvio company inside the ticket office. When the weather was warm, he would enjoy himself in the sun on the train platform. When it was time for Elvio to return home on the train at night, Lampo ran after the train for a long way and then sadly gave up and went back to the station.


One night as Elvio was riding home on the train , he noticed that Lampo was lying at his feet. Afraid that the conductor would see the dog on the train and shout at him, Elvio pushed Lampo under a seat. Luckily, the conductor did not notice the dog. Lampo came home with Elvio and met his family. Then, after a short visit, Lampo boarded the last train and went back to the station. 


Lampo quickly learned all of the train schedules. He would ride home from work with Elvio every night and then ride back to the station alone. Every morning, Lampo arrived at Elvio's house in time to walk his young daughter, Mivna, to school. The faithful dog would then take another train to Campiglia to spend time with his master, then travel again to accompany Mivna home from school at 11:30.


Soon, Lampo began to take the trains all over Italy. Lampo became famous among the men who worked on the railroad, as his journeys became more frequent, complicated, and mysterious. No one could explain why he traveled or how he always found the right train back to Campiglia. People decided that Lampo was a unique dog. Some of the railroad officials were against Lampo's illegal travels. They were afraid he would bite a passenger or cause some other problems. Finally, the stationmaster threatened to call the dogcatcher if Elvio didn't get rid of the dog. 


Elvio decided to put Lampo on a train going as far away as possible. Months went by and Lampo did not come back. Mivna missed him very much and prayed for his return. Finally one day, a sad, very thin, tired Lampo returned to Elvio's office. Everyone, even the stationmaster, was sorry about what had happened. From then on, Lampo was allowed to ride the trains whenever he wanted. After seven years, Lampo grew old, and he began to need Elvio's help to board the train. One day Lampo was seen lying dead on the tracks. A year later, a life-sized statue of Lampo was set up at Campiglia station.


P.S. Lampo means -  flash of light in Italian.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

A Landscape of Rain

The rain doesn’t come to this place all the year round, not any more. The clouds gather above, but never fall down the vaster land parched in waiting. A backdrop of eagerness hangs in the middle. The fullness of desire gains more depth above. The ground beneath sinks within the hollowed darkness. A possibility only hangs in between, like Lucifer, the fallen angel, sailing in the abyss between heaven and hell. They said, that rests upon us what to make out of it, hell or heaven ? 

Empty frame: the blank horizon by Sohom
What is reality? Reality, is that what hurts? Or is reality what assuages the bruises with its rickety fingers and icy sinews ? Primal mind bellows to get rid of suffocation, but they refuse to fall off. So many things gather above head. Mind gets numb. Sleep engulfs. Day breaks. Suddenly awake out of a dream, the sound of rain chimes in ears from outside. It’s raining again. Relieved. But was it a nightmare? Or a limbo? Mind is tired. Tired with its perpetual wrestling. It feels sleepy again. Droopier, the eyelids fall closer. Sleep engulfs into deep, now with the promise of a new day.

P.S. I wrote this around last September. I was going through an ANGRY PHASE and I was bleak. But, I like bleak things, like a Tim Burton Movie. 

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Prologue to "My Name is RED"

Prologue 
Have been to New Delhi for a week due some detour. Missed Kolkata but coming back today, same hot atmosphere with sweltering humidity - not feeling so great. So, am here posting something which I had done for some fun about 10 months ago. RED, here - has nothing to do with the Politicos of West Bengal [ read WB Commies ] , 'am more of an apolitical person who knows what is a spade, a spade and call it by the same name. It started with Motabhai [ Aditya Kabir ] started to post his famed status messages in FB about Rocky-Cocky parts of History at large, as according to him -
history is essentially a rock band. very rocky, very banned.
 I picked it up and did my own version simultaneously both are fun. But one needs to be a bit Jabberwockied to get through these. I am posting MB's version as a prologue to mine. You'll need a bit of patience to read them full. 


Glimpses of World History - history is essentially a rock band. very rocky, very banned 


in the beginning, there was only darkness. then stephen king created the big bang, and separated the big from the bang. not to be outdone, god almighty zilla, the other cambridge physicist, created jesus christ. to make the story complete he also created judas, pilate and mary magdalene - apparently by order of universal studios.

in 209, chuck norris established the roundhouse. god saw the roundhouse and it was good. so he blessed it. soon the town sprouted around the roundhouse. check norris saw the town and it was good. so he killed the first mayor - scooby doo. the doo was done for good.

in 296, disneyland was taken over by santa claus inc. rudolf rednose reindeer, the spokesperson for jolly ole saint nicholas, the chairperson of the company, kept the acquisition secret in apprehension of fairy-dust producing mafiosi. but, cnn eventually found the truth out, a case that became famous as the santagate tapes.

in 361, everyone was happy. they were so happy that 80% of all strip-joints and 65% of all pubs had to shut down due to lack of business. that was the year when christmas became popular. coca-cola, red bull and guiness decided to sponsor it together.

in 461, tut-ankh-amen, senior producer for virgin records floated the infamous band peter, paul and mary. tzar peter the great form russia, paul mccartney from liver-cirrhosis and typhoid mary from the US were picked as members through the first reality show - "lend a rubber" - sponsored by micheline. unfortunately the band had more records returned than sold.

in 498, dj a-shock became the emperor of india. he had but one problem, india was just a myth and not a real country. well... a-shock was a follower of lord badass, the prince of persia and propagator of rebirths. apparently he believed that by his sixth reincarnation india will start to exist.

in 548, martini discovered the radio. he was also known as macaroni. early radios looked a bit like sashimi, only more spicy. martini aka macaroni improved his design to make them look like pasta, only less spicy. conservatives who liked the early design, and pastorals who liked the later design have been at each others throat ever since.

in 581, the town faced a real catastrophe, the nature of which is still unknown. the day was obviously saved by the powerpuff girls - jayne mansfield, dolly parton and pamela anderson. though the day was saved, the night wasn't. the night happily went comatose (alternatively spelled tomatoes)

617 was the year of the great schism. hindus and muslims finally fell apart over spiritual matters. hindus called their holy spirit the rum, and muslims called theirs the gin. the beers of netherlands (an alternative term for hell) took the opportunity to start the beer war in south of france (alternatively known as zululand).

in 678, nothing happened. it was a pretty big thing to happen. nothing was produced by hollywood mega-mogul boris yeltsin. nothing was performed by the queen of sheba, and her boyfriend king soloman (previously known as prince loneboy). nothing was all the rage for a year. then nothing died a silent death with the advent of the latest fad - something.

in 731, the marx brothers - richard and karl - met mommies, the ruling parents of egypt who replaced papas as the dominant parents. that meeting inspired a number of chart topping singles like "star spangled banner", "good bye blue sky" and "beat it". the number of mommies declined over time. they are now listed with the irresponsible union for contradiction in nature (iucn) red list for endangered species.

in 755, abraham lincoln aka washboard abs drafted the american declaration of independence which started like "all men are equal". but since that left out women and the superman from consideration, it had to be redrafted. the final version read like "all men, women, the superman and wonder woman are almost equal, you moron".

in 814, daniel learned to read. since books were not available in israel, he was reading only the writings on the wall. it's worth noting that the wall is essentially a beatles album. eventually daniel invented a book that had walls built into it. for some strange reason he called it a facebook.

in 866, the pope fell in love with the dope. christianity became the highest of religions ever since. it was declared an aviation hazard by the federal aviation administration (faa). world wild life fund (wwf) also declared it as a hazard to bald eagles and vampire bats.

in 1069, mount vesuvius erupted in rome, more precisely near the termini station. though the italians hated it, the japos really liked the erupting mountain. they immediately imported in to yokohama sub-urbs, and renamed it as mount fuji. the newly installed mountain gave birth to one of the biggest merchandising fads in history.

in 1011, leonardo de caprio painted all of his ex-girlfriends - donalisa, analisa, rhonalisa and monalisa - and posted to myspace. the girls sued leonardo. he took shelter in the trees with rest of the ninja turtles - donatello, raphael and michelangelo. unfortunately the hand of law is pretty long, and they ended up weaving woolen gloves for those hands for a long time at blackgate penitentiary in gotham city.

in 1129, the whole town was gutted by fire, burning everything and a few marshmallows. fortunately the marshmallows burned to the right consistency. and god saw it was good, and he made the three stooges - hitler, zenghis, and montezuma - the lords of marshmallows. pretty neat. only cain, the mayor or the town, was not too happy about it. so, he was banished to the world of sirens and cyclops forever. sad.


1172 was the most peaceful year in history. only 3,822 wars erupted around the world, and no more than 39% of global population was wiped off, with 44% more maimed or crippled. there were enough people left to write chronicles of peace, love and prosperity. it is believed that a few ballads were written as well.

in 1228, chuck norris pretended to die. obviously, he can't die, because the inmates of hell are not ready to take more punishment. no one was allowed to ask questions about the death. because, you don't ask chuck norris anything, he does the questioning after he kills you.

in 1348, before the black plague and after the jewish holocaust, they had three years of peace and happiness. it was only shortly interrupted by the marriage between aladin and rapunzel. they said dane girls are too meek for arab boys. thus was the circumcision invented. all hail the skin flick.

in 1414, the sun refused to set in the british empire. so the poor people at branson bakery invented the turkish empire. a pretty cool invention considering that the sun started setting in that empire every morning. naturally, tourism started booming there immediately. the british are such losers.

in 1430, robin hood joined the crusades. but since the crusaders were tired of blood and gore by that time, all the action he had was a bit pornographic in nature. the king of hebrews cut his role down to a pg13 version, and the war was lost to turkish harems. long live harems of the world.


in 1535, national a and s association (nasa) discovered the moon. skeptics, agnostics and whirling dervishes claimed that it was not discovered, rather it was invented by nasa. the controversy continued over months, until they had to forget the whole issue in the face of extreme threat from killer ants from lebanon. incidentally, the moon was never seen again.


circa 1617, the kingdom of heaven, a disney franchise, went out of vogue.

in 1678, the sun finally rose in the turkish empire. the light shone through all the harems. obviously it marked the end of the turkish conquests. presumably no one was ready to to conquer the unwashed and oversized harem dwellers. not even the turks.

in 1702, the ottomans eventually moved on to make space for otto-womans. it was much celebrated by eco-feminists at the height of their bra-burning movement.


in 1765 they had three consecutive years without any january 25, the christmas. poor folks, they had to make do with the seven years war. in the end the turks won. but, they had uncle ho on their side. it was only then the magna carta decided - there would never be a year without a christmas, let alone three.

in 1743, national enquirer printed a story about the gregorian decree to start a new calender. it was found to be a piece of misinformation, but nobody cared. in fact, no body ever cared about a cleander in the whole of human history.

1812 had been a year of tragedies. that year methuselah, the ever longest surviving rockstar, got married to britney spears, peanut butter was invented by a group of albanian physicists, and the shaolin monks signed a multi-billion dollar endorsement contract with nike. effects of those cataclysms are still reflected in the stars.‎



in 1889, the year of the black cat, according to viking astrology, akbar the great retiered ending his reign over whirling dervishes and the witches of birmingham. then he went into theater acting. for several decades he ruled the broadway scene, and won a few awards in the process.
 othe people are doing this too, only they are failing college admission tests:http://www.leo.org/information/freizeit/fun/history.html

the rest of the band member are resting in peace here:http://cliptank.com/PeopleofInfluencePainting.htm

Friday, April 29, 2011

GREEN chick

We all live to eat and that's not the other way around, one of my best friend is now living at Nottingham for his PGs and as today we were chatting o'er many things right from the shrewed water glass marketing tactics at the "Yo Sushi" to the Chinese Breakfasts at the Territy  Bazar,Kolkata.... almost everything related to food, as we both have our very own food pilgrimage history .We had eaten at the very finest restaurants some times and on some other time we sat down on the foot-path to have a plate Bihari Litti, so it's a foodie talk. And my friend shared his recipe of Hariyali Chicken - actually what he has been eating for last few days. Pari, despatch a photo of your chick, buddy, I will attach that to the post - and here's the recipe I am copy pasting [ as it is ] -
ya ya !! I am a lazybone. I know.
X-mas Lunch @ Pari's Place, 2009 & the guy in green shirt with his backside peeping  at 10 o'clock  position is Pari and the lady in Sari , feeding us, is Kakima :), else the girl in peach cardigan is me and the girl wearing purple tunic is Pritha.
 dhone pata [coriander leaves] ar tar saathe mint leaves ar ginger garlic paste ar salt and ektu lemon tar saathe 1 cup curd ar ektu tandoori masala bas...shob diye paste tar por marinade the boneless thigh portions and then.. wrap it up in foil paper put it on a baking tray - put it in the oven - wait for 20 min at 200 degrees - now open the wrapped mouths and put the oven in grill mode - bar....tar porei...ecstasy...!!!!!


So, go people and have it and post the pix at FB, sure I will do mine. And Pari , next time there will be our very own PANTAmissu recipe - I hope.


Photo From - The Economist by Steve O'Brien
And of course we talked about what Katie 'n Will did today!!! :D 

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Monologue from Pan's Labyrinth

A long time ago, in the underground realm, where there are no lies or pain, there lived a Princess who dreamed of the human world. She dreamed of blue skies, soft breeze, and sunshine. One day, eluding her keepers, the Princess escaped. Once outside, the brightness blinded her and erased every trace of the past from her memory. She forgot who she was and where she came from. Her body suffered cold, sickness, and pain. Eventually, she died. However, her father, the King, always knew that the Princess' soul would return, perhaps in another body, in another place, at another time. And he would wait for her, until he drew his last breath, until the world stopped turning...
And it is said that the Princess returned to her father's kingdom. That she reigned there with justice and a kind heart for many centuries. That she was loved by her people. And that she left behind small traces of her time on Earth, visible only to those who know where to look.

"Many, many years ago in a sad, faraway land, there was an enormous mountain made of rough, black stone. At sunset, on top of that mountain, a magic rose blossomed every night that made whoever plucked it immortal. But no one dared go near it because its thorns were full of poison. Men talked amongst themselves about their fear of death, and pain, but never about the promise of eternal life. And every day, the rose wilted, unable to bequeath its gift to anyone... forgotten and lost at the top of that cold, dark mountain, forever alone, until the end of time."


Sunday, February 13, 2011

Now, The whole sky is for me



Valentine's Day always reminds me of the book ''Little Prince''. I know, it's a children book 'n one of my favourites. Yet, growing up I've found it more 'matured' than ever. Only immature thing I did was to write once a good-bye note based on its last chapter - "All men have the stars," and when I was being asked - ''if this is for me, hell... I'd be damn proud!''
I kept mum...

"And at night you will look up at the stars. Where I live everything is so small that I cannot show you where my star is to be found. It is better, like that. My star will just be one of the stars, for you. And so you will love to watch all the stars in the heavens . . . they will all be your friends. And, besides, I am going to make you a present . . .

All men have the stars, but they are not the same things for different people. For some, who are travelers, the stars are guides. For others they are no more than little lights in the sky. For others, who are scholars, they are problems. For my businessman they were wealth. But all these stars are silent. You--you alone--will have the stars as no one else has them--

In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing, when you look at the sky at night . . . You--only you--will have stars that can laugh !


And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me. And you will sometimes open your window, so, for that pleasure . . . And your friends will be properly astonished to see you laughing as you look up at the sky! Then you will say to them, 'Yes, the stars always make me laugh!' And they will think you are crazy. It will be a very shabby trick that I shall have played on you . . .

It will be as if, in place of the stars, I had given you a great number of little bells that knew how to laugh . . .

You know, it will be very nice. I, too, shall look at the stars. All the stars will be wells with a rusty pulley. All the stars will pour out fresh water for me to drink . . .

That will be so amusing! You will have five hundred million little bells, and I shall have five hundred million springs of fresh water . . ."

Now I have changed. That's not a news. That was something inevitable. But I have grown up into something else. That is different. Now things are more like : on 14th eve, where we both 've met years ago, I will shout ''RUN FOREST RUN" for you. You can chant - RUN LOLA RUN!!! Depending on how you feel. 


But I will always feel better. Because, now I have my stars. The whole sky is for me. 

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Dialogues on Social Media [ interview for my dissertation paper on - Social Media : The Transition of Human Interaction in a Democratic Model with the Emergence of New Age Digital Marketing Platform ]

Mr.Aditya Kabir is the Planning Director in Asiatic JWT, Dhaka, Bangladesh. Being into account planning he's well aware about the social media and it's marketing aspects. Over telephonic conversation on 7 January,2011, with Elina Sen, he provided more comprehensive ideas on Social Media and how it affects our social proximity and its power to provide a 360 degree product showcase in digital domain.

Elina : What do you feel about Social Media and its aspects regarding human interaction and providing a digital marketing platform ?

Aditya : In Social Media the contents are not only generated by the manufacturers, the active participation of end users makes it a dynamic platform. With Web2.0 it’s truly providing a two way traffic between the providers and the users. Unlike Web1.0, where the contents provided by the manufacturers were paramount, now in social media the end users are taking active participation. In social media dialogue the company is a small provider only, they can start up the conversation in the domain, but not necessarily they would have to be the initiators always. Social Media is empowering users beyond any previous limits seen before.

Elina : With more power, do the users feel more cared for ?

Aditya : For the audience and the audience attention - this presents an wonderful opportunity. when engaged right - they can feel so empowered and cared-for, that the right use of social media can create loyal out of casuals and fans out of loyals. Here audience-feedback is instantaneous, direct and... well... often surprising. We did surveys and the most striking fact emerged as 85% of Facebook contents are the users’ comments. Not the notes written or the photos and videos uploaded.

Elina : What is the main criteria to sustain in this digital marketing domain ?

Aditya : Social media seems difficult. So many groups and like-pages and network-pages and individual profiles exist. so many options. and... really... haven't we seen most of these pages and groups failing? For instance, take a look at those dozens of groups Nokia created all are floating in limbo from the very outset. Even the Airtel launch page in Facebook are flooded on queries over tariff plans. The product has to be very engaging with its content. It must have that attitude to propagate in this era of Attention Economy. The old frame of product endorsements will soon be out of fashion, the product has to evolve with time. A popular soap like Kyunki Saas Bhi.... might enjoy many folds viewership on TV over Prannoy Roy’s NDTV talk show, but on social media later would gain momentum through nationwide active participation of audience. The soap won’t have the same attitude in social media, it will be weeded out with no shelf life.
And so the brand must have that much of engaging power into its booty, no matter how bigger be the name is. Tell me, what Nirma has to offer with its current image in this forum. Even Coke’s rigid promotional model won’t incur much in these, rather take Mountain Dew - it’s creating the much needed vibes. Separate Facebook page of Nescafe for its new ad-campaign with Deepika Padukon is creating buzz over Facebook. The campaign strategies must be tailored - keeping in mind the forum of Social Media.

Elina : Talking about shelf life, the whole social media seems so dynamic...

Aditya : Yes, it’s like getting zeitgeist with the real time. Now what is real time ? See, when SRK came to Dhaka last month, a guy named Gaji Illias was called upon stage just like other SRK shows, he was total drunk and made a total fool out of himself. But with his 8 minutes of infamy, within an hour dozens of Social Media spaces were covered on his name, even Facebook fan pages came up in no time. This is it. This instantaneousness is the real time. Things come up in social media platform before they make way to the main stream media. In fact the line dividing them is getting blurred nowadays,

Elina : So, what should be the objectives for the endorsers ?

Aditya : The product has to be interesting and most important people behind it must have enough engaging capacity. For manufacturers with active audience participation there will be no scope to lie about their products, they have to be honest if they want to survive and they must be interesting. With no hinge no bar people’s feedback, today they have to adopt themselves into a more flexible cast.

Elina : and there is YouTube adding to this dynamics...

Aditya : It’s a mind boggling domain within social media. If you decide to see all the user generated video in YouTube, uploaded in a single day, you will need 476 years. This is the most dynamic aspect in social media platform. It has made the TV an interactive medium. Many commercials are now gains people’s attention through YouTube viewership. With facebook open graph the traffic of viewers can be mapped, this gives a better leg up in planning. A short film “Bhoutik” is directed by a friend, when promoted in YouTube, it was seen that 50% viewership came with Facebook sharing. The like, share, recommend plugins of Facebook is bringing everything in a single platform.

Elina : these whole thing giving me the feeling of George Orwell-ish vision of future when we will start living in our profiles instead of our lives.

Aditya : [ Laughing along ] not that of course. Hope not. But it’s true, sooner or later the whole system will come under the umbrella of social media, we have to make it better, if not flawless.

Elina : Already, Israel Ministry of Foreign Affairs are connecting with people world wide through their Facebook Page, Hugo Chavez has his direct twitter account to address Venezuelans grievances. So it will become more constructive in future and more omnipresent.

Aditya : For South Asia , social media is primarily, secondarily and tertiarily just the facebook. LinkedIn, Twitter - other social networks are almost non-existent here.So social media will develop here and world wide, and they will develop more and more rapidly.


Epilogue - Conclusion On Social Media Bubble - Making Social Media A More Pertinent Platform  :

We are in the middle of a zeitgeist, human behavior is constantly changed by technology,whether the behavior is intended or an offshoot. Many will argue about the frivolous approach that social networking sites adopts apparently, but it must be remembered that users of social media constitute a broad spectrum of age group of 15-35 and in today’s urban societies the consumer buying capacity falls into the age group of 26-35 and onwards. So statistically Social Media caters to a very important dissection of society’s crossroad. Social Media connects us , reconnects us, provides news feeds, makes us aware of the current surroundings. Like air it can’t be seen in shape , yet it’s there and we are standing under its umbrella. World is becoming more open through it, walled gardens are no more locked up. With the user centric web in rise, we all are living our lives along with its cyber extensions because our cyborg nature is breathing life in the domain of social media. If English author George Orwell were present today, he might have come up with a new novel sequel of “1984”, where human populations are profiled in the Zion of the social networking sites, each of their activities are monitored and stored in the world wide web servers. George Orwell only had his thoughts but today the fact is more stark than it was imagined before. In the science fiction written by Philip K Dick, the author has raised the rhetoric - “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?” We are not there yet. Yet, it’s true that - We feel comfortable to see ourselves on Profiles to avoid being an Unsub ; "There's something reassuring about seeing an irregularly-shaped organic body confined in a rigidly rectangular framework. That's why we built zoos. That's why we built prisons. That's why we built cities." And now we thrive in the Zion of Social Media.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Republic day and us

Republic Day - it's not a mere emotive in excess. in a salad bowl nation, where two and many distinct cultures, way of lives mix - it becomes necessary to celebrate a common cause, a cause which has build this nation. democracy was not only earned in 1950, day by day with many positive changes around we are striving for it even today. and that for sure calls for a celebration. Cheers!


:) :) :) 

Sunday, January 23, 2011

unrelenting demand for JPC : Right or Wrong

So far it has come out that US$ 38.27 billion has been lost to the exchequer. No matter what as an opposition BJP conveys, it's undeniable that stalling the winter forum in parliament has added a few more billions to it. Whether it was right or wrong - asking may not yield a definitive answer cause it's going to be more complex with time, yet a question can be asked whether it was justifiable stance? BJP spokesperson Mr. Arun Jaitley has said over media for numerous times that concerning the Radia tape controversy - it's evident that the systems through out the country are plagued by scams and so far according to him and rest of many opposition parties like TDP,CPM and many congress allies like TMC, all are asking for JPC relentlessly.

Their point is, in joint parliamentary probe everyone and anyone in this working Govt. will be answerable for their actions and the related repercussions. Still a common man can raise a question how much this relentless stalling of Parliament is justified, as already it came out in studies that a minute of disruption in parliament causes Rs. 2600 loss of public money. Though opposition is claiming that their relentless demand for JPC and as a repercussion, the stalling of Parliament has caused Raja losing his portfolio and so they believe it has given momentum in CBI investigation and CAG probe.

Debates are inevitable within working structures of any democratic state and these debates are what makes our nation keep going. So, stalling parliament session, is justified or not, will be asked for several times in near future. In Shakespeare's Julius Caesar,Cassius told Brutus : The fault is not in our stars dear Brutus, it's within us. A true democracy can work only in its proper management of parliamentary system. Demanding relentlessly for JPC could be a part of it, without creating any hindrance within it. Common People like us still have their faiths over the functions of our justice body. The process will enfold its result in front of us in its due time. We can strive only to make things better, as it has been the only workable motto that only works here and keeps the common-man in us going .

Friday, January 21, 2011

Under the Shadow of Blasphemy

Islam Believes in Freedom - Wahiduddin Khan

Blasphemy is in the news. According to general perception, Islam prescribes capital punishment to a person who indulges in blasphemy, that is using profane language against the Prophet of Islam. But this concept of blasphemy is completely alien to the original teaching of Islam. Before the advent of Islam, difference of belief was also punishable act. They used to punish on matters of belief just as on mats of social crime. This old practice is called religious persecution in history. Islam abolished this practice. The prophet of Islam declared that personal belief is a subject of discussion and persuasion rather than a legal punishment.

However, if non-believers use profane language against the Prophet, Muslims are directed not to react. They have only two options, either to simply ignore it or to respond on equal basis, that is, issuing statement in return for a statement. The Quran says : " The recompense of an ill-deed is an the like thereof (42:20)." According to this injunction, reaction must be on equal basis, that is, word in return for word, statement in return for statement, book in return for book.

If you go through the Quran and the hadith ( sayings and actions of the Prophet of Islam ), the only two authentic sources of Islam, you will find that there is not a single Quraniv verse or hadith that gives this kind of injunction which says: " Man shatama nabiyakum faqtuluhu. ( Kill the person who commits blasphemy against the Prophet )."

Such an injunction was added in the Islamic law only during the Abbasid caliphate, about 150 years after the death (632 AD) of the Prophet. Although the majority of the Fuqaha ( Muslim jurists )of the period accepted the law, it was clearly an innovation which is not acceptable in Islam.

According to a well known hadith, there are three authentic periods of the Islamic history: the period of the Prophet, and the period of Sahaba ( companions of the prophet ), and the period of Tabein ( companions of the companions ). It is a fact that all the Fuqaha belonged to the Abbasid period which came after these authentic periods. According to a hadith. the Prophet of Islam has said : " I have left behind for you thaqaalan, two authentic sources of Islam: the book of God, and the Sunnah of the Prophet. You will not astray till you adhere to these authentic sources." (Mu'atta malik, hadith no. 1661). And those additions made by thee Muslim jurists of the later history are certainly not a part of the authentic sources. According to this Islamic injunction, if there is a person who commits blasphemy , then the responsibility of Muslims is to meet him and persuade him and to remove his misunderstandings by peaceful means and if supposing he fails to understand then Muslims are left only with only one option, that is to pray for him.

There is ample of evidence that tells us what to do in such cases. For example, once when Prophet was in Mecca, one idol worshipper came to him and told him face to face. " Muzammanan abaina (O Muhammad you are a condemned person.)" The Prophet simply smiled. The smile was a kind of a moral response and was bound to hit his conscience. He fell into introspection. And after some time he accepted him as the Prophet, and became one of his followers.

Islam greatly believes in freedom of expression. i would like to say that the secular law of India in this context is more Islamic than the so-called Islamic law of Pakistan.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wahiduddin Khan is an Islamic spiritual scholar and founder of Center for Peace and Spirituality International

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wahiduddin_Khan

as published on January 24,2011 edition of India Today

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Bluebird by Charles Bukowski

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out but
I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I'm not going
to let anybody see you.

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out but
I pour whiskey on him and inhale cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks never know that
he's in there.



there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay down,
do you want to mess me up?
you want to screw up the works?
you want to blow my book sales in Europe?


there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out but I'm too clever,
I only let him out at night sometimes
when everybody's asleep.
I say, I know that you're there,
so don't be sad.


then I put him back,
but he's singing a little in there,
I haven't quite let him die
and we sleep together like that
with our secret pact and it's nice enough
to make a man weep, but I don't weep, do you?




P.S. This was published in Bukowski's book "The Last Night of the Earth Poems" circa 1992

Monday, September 6, 2010

The Snake I Feared


What's the most lethal Snake on this earth ? 


When asked, the answers I got many.... from the African Black Mamba to the Indian King Cobra, from the Ancient Basilisk to the Amazonian Boa Constrictor and so many other deadly names of the dangerous slithering vipers. 

I got scared. 

I paused and then realized only Snake I should fear is what had me just bitten.





Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The car broke down, we did push push...

Today’s morning was as usual, mundane. Waking up early, getting ready. Gobbling few bites with a quick slurp of tea. Zooming to the car, BAM! Slamming the door, and zapping through the morning traffic. While driving, a middle aged man was moronically crossing the road, without giving a look what was coming in his way. I with my moral obligation gave him a stern flying comment : "don’t you have any brakes on your feet?" He stared hard and so did I with more intensity. Then blabbering to myself, this morons are polluting the class of jay walkers. They lack the basic acrobatic skills. Few more morons I faced during rest of my drive. I was punctual as usual but only got it by whisker, as usual. I passed the key to our home caretaker and told him to drive the car back home safely. This is the picture, in a regular entrainment happens over and over in my life , like all other things that happen daily.

About almost two hours later, mother called. Tensed. She told me the car hadn't  arrived back. So many possibilities passed my mind, in a flash. Zoom! Each of them was worst than previous.Possibilities are astronomically enormous. Ranging from bone tickling funny to sordid gruesome.Good, it happened in salt lake. If the stage was to be set on the vastness of main city kolkata…rest you can imagine! I hung up, telling her not to worry, because I am here to make things all right.

Easier it was said than done. I was clueless. I fumbled to the girl I was talking to, made vague excuses and zapped out from there. On the street, a fear of uncertainty grappled within me. Told you, possibilities are enormous. I rushed to the rickshaw stand. Hailed the standing one in queue and told him precisely what I’m going to look for in the by rodes of salt lake, within the possibilities of trajectories from that place to the way back home. And the search begun. I asked the rickshaw-wala if any road accident happened. Answer was negative but at the same time load inside me was getting heavy.

Tension dissolved. Ma called me back telling me the exact location of the place where the car had broken down. Achinto da has lost his mobile few moths back. And this lost baggage has given him a big relief by providing an excuse of not being available to the people he works for. So while he pushed the car to a more safer place with most tactile maneuver possible, we were being frenzied. Anyway, all’s well that goes well. I got there ASAP.

Immense , yes that’s the word. Immense relief prevailed when I got a glance of my car. I called dad over phone . He was as usual cool and a pillar support whenever things go wrong with me. And better he restrained himself from bragging me about the car he drives himself, always reminding me how good are this new cars with all those features. As if with all new things he gets, the old becomes someone elses! But fact is , I am touchy about my good old car. I love it. I have so many memories with it, and with all of it’s predecessors. Don’t find it funny, I treat cars of any make with reverence. It’s a fetish I nurture. Like my fetishes with shoes, watches, and bags !

The mechanic asked me if we can somehow manage to move at home with the car, as he can’t come right now. With all the symptoms at hand, dad told me: might be like last time it’s the distributor system’s problem. So we have to drive it in a steady way. When it stops, where ever it stops, we have to wait to allow the engine to become cool and then have to move ahead. Daunting. We started. The car got stopped at some crossing next time. It was an ideal hit by bus and run for your life place. Both me and Achinto da had to get out of the car to give it a push. Achinto da steered and pushed from the front while I was pushing from the back. It was a treat for the passerby! To see a well dressed girl to push a car, not everyone sees on their way. But they only laughed. I giggled back.

Getting into the safe alley nearer home. I took a break and took a snap of Achinto pushing the car. Wish someone could be there to take my snap of pushing and getting reduced to perspiration. It’d have provided me a helluva of inspiration later on. So the credo was push, push and push. I kept thinking if it’s a toy car, I could have pulled it. Mechanically more apt. Crazy thoughts. Never go away. This way and that way, finally we reached home. And the world got saved.

P.S : The car came back from the garage. She is okay. Only was a minor problem. She’s gonna stay with me for better and for the best. I am happy with a smile on my face.


here is an addendum with the photo :
an unmistakable fact came upon me while I was seeing the photo later on : Next time I should be more appreciative towards the sartorial senses of Achinto da. His lethal combo of green tee and orange bermuda was quite an apt attire for pushing the car on street, while mine was quite a blunder, brown tee with jeans and pushing a brown car while buses kept coming with great roars from behind on the prime office time. Vulnerable. According to my cousin, Achinto da is more like the version of Bilbo Baggins, more than what meets the eye!


Coming into light...end of the tunnel

I used to feel amused whenever I'd come across anyone wailing in despair. Well, basically I'm not that type of going overboard on emotional terrains. Quietness and solitude, I feel comfortable with. I enjoy good laugh while contemplating alone over sun besetting at the western sky. The birds coming back to their nest or flocking at the higher turrets in neighborhood, creating a dulcet chirping backdrop. A sad overtone was always there, breeding within the core of my quietness. But this time it was different. This time I wasn't strong. Eager to rebound on my own like I did before. Not this time. This time for the very first moment, I felt the pain that comes with it, it wasn't a luxury. The more I tried to show my back  to it. the more it get over my shoulders like a phantom, bound to haunt me.

What is scary? Do you know ? The scariest thing is when you try to make yourself forget something with all your might, summoning all your will...yet you find it's not waning, not leaving , not going away. The scariest thing is when your right side of brain keeps telling you the coldest logics, dissecting each and every facts up to their farthest bottom and making yourself submissive to the nemesis, yet your left brain keep telling you to look beyond the glass ceiling and to keep the fool's hope kindled. Hope is good as long as it's validated by standings of facts. I still abhor the way people makes the show of grief a staggering opera performance. But I also feel the empathy that makes that whole thing being staged.Only now I can feel it.Only now.

But with all and everything, I am not ashamed to feel blues and I am not awkward to express it, even if it sounds pathetic. I know I won't make it pathetic. I will retrace the footsteps and become a brood like I used to be. But I do have something. That survives me. Faith. Somehow I do have this immense faith on me. That no matter how deep is water, I'll swim across. Somehow. Cause I am far from figuring out, how it works. Maybe life compels us to learn. My learning curve never reaches a peak. I learn and still falter and again I learn. I am alive and so I do exist. My faith keeps me going. That one day it will be good. Not only for a few moments passing by. That time, it will stay with me for a while.




''All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.


From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.''

Thursday, July 15, 2010

What was she thinking? Photo-shopped memories...

She had a picture perfect childhood along its memories. But she's feeling lately that in few places if it could be photo-shopped, cropping out a few people who're hazardous and making that left behind vacant portions filled up by the soothing pastel moments, that could've been a hell lot of fun. Forgetting was her forte. But now it's more like a horror when she's trying to wipe out something, yet she can't.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

To my gravedigger

I'm almost on a verge to check in the heartbreak hotel. The partouze will soon be over, I'll wear the same mourning clothes just like everyone, but let that be on tomorrow. Today I'll live like there was no tomorrow to think about. There will be no tomorrow to look forward. It's today that only have I got. So do not scorn me for being a fool to dream on. It's today I live. It's today that always stays with me forever, making my limits stretched to immortality.


I'm abhorring the sights of the people exhibiting the grief  in manifolds, cloaked like the old druids within the circle of Stonehenge...forgetting it was the life we all supposed to celebrate. Grief is inevitable but erecting a disfigured tomb of Nosferatu, like a melancholy franchise.... hardly I can afford that. Tears drips down but it's the Lestat, I've chosen myself to become. Trying to find a meaning from the darkness within .

I'm human—my "memory is no more than a sieve". Time heals all wounds for my kind."Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me''...it will; what I'm finding hardest to forgo, it will pass over with each trickle of warm blood through my veins.

But still a question rages within, whether is it out of compulsion we are made prone to sadness? The whole erection of vampire Nosferatu is sucking my blood and leaving me numb. Battles are lost without being fought. Self-appointed adversities are vindictive about my slipping away. I'd tried to rise up and to feel the taste of rouge but I didn't care. It wasn't a disaster. I lost two cities, lovely ones, a vaster realm once I called my own. Many emotions were washed down when the banks of the two rivers on those two places were flooded. Like places, peoples were lost too. No, it's still not a disaster. Though it looks like one. And it will look like so, when I will lose the city I'm in, with the river flowing through it, people I loved here and the whole the continent.

Pertinent problem I'm facing is : when I try to look back in some of those few moments, I thought I complete. I don't find any faces to remember. The faces, those were visible then, not that I'd to imagine them. But back in here, now it's only words I do remember. Black and white words of happiness, sorrow, despair, joy and exhilaration. I'm not allowed to dream. No no, not here. Elsewhere I am free. Here it would be bad, like it's worse to take someone else's toy while they were asleep. Bound to my little existent conscience, through the mazes in my sub conscious what roams and haunts my dream is only memories. But memories devoid of moments. It's only the dialogues but who are delivering them, can't be seen. I slept today and for last few days only with words swirling inside my mind. Without any shapes and feel. Only the past is always dancing in the tune of my present.

Still under the splendid suns, around the veil of morning mists and along the blowing winds....life is worthy of all the turmoils. While the few glimpses of serene peace are the reflections of those moments where I've fallen in love with it over and over again.

Thought home could be a safer refuge, going there...back in home, spending few moments in reflection of past meets present would assuage the suffocation. But suddenly the barriers got forged stronger and higher...it's seeming impossible to scale. Not really, but what seems as what they are. I miss my winters back home. I miss the prolonged autumns, ushering with rainy showers while stretched along with dewy mists. I miss the dry springs with sudden arrival of storms over parched advent in summer. I don't miss the summer that much. May be because I am going through my balmy summers. That's gonna be staying around for a while. In fact I miss my home and the small town but never agree to the fact that I do...deep rooted it might seem that I know, I can never go back home, stuck at the carousal of metropolis, I'm not going to find out the reason behind my self denial, not that the truth would be something I must avoid at all cost, I felt it long before I can express, but I know somehow that I don't want to be liberated from that bondage, knotted somewhere, better remain not found and untouched. 

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

My Ghost Story : an autopsy on my kill


kill the bull.
As many as you want...
Their stomping in virility only creates disturbia.


But...


"Remember it's a sin to kill a mockingbird...Mockingbirds don't do one thing but make music for us to enjoy... but sing their hearts out for us. That's why it's a sin to kill a mockingbird.''


A bull only needs a bulldozer , nothin' else.

________________________________

Sunday, July 11, 2010

A mixed aftertaste

''হায় বুদ্ধিহীন মানবহৃদয় ! ভ্রান্তি কিছুতেই ঘোচে না, যুক্তিশাস্ত্রের বিধান বহুবিলম্বে মাথায় প্রবেশ করে, প্রবল প্রমাণকেও অবিশ্বাস করিয়া মিথ্যা আশাকে দুই বাহুপাশে বাঁধিয়া বুকের ভিতরে প্রাণপণে জড়াইয়া ধরিতে যায়, অবশেষে একদিন সমস্ত নাড়ী কাটিয়া হৃদয়ের রক্ত শুষিয়া সে পলায়ন করে, তখন চেতনা হয় এবং দ্বিতীয় ভ্রান্তিপাশে পড়িবার জন্য চিত্ত ব্যাকুল হইয়া উঠে |'' by Rabindranath Tagore